day 16

.4 mile done

i've got this goal see.. to not be so fat anymore.

i have to remind myself of that, every time i walk.
every time i don't want to walk.

that this is why i am doing this. so i'm not so fat.

i don't think this goal is exceptionally remarkable. half of what i weigh now. that's not a modest number either.. half of what i weigh right now (or the last time i stepped on a scale), would be 240. 240 pounds is the size of a very large man. the majority of the women i know weight less than 150... i have no illusions of myself getting that small, unless i get very very sick or there is absolutely nothing to eat. in other words.. not by choice. that's right, i said it. i don't WANT to be that little.

i want to be comfortable.

hey. i didn't want to go on a walk tonight. but i did. i did it. (yay) i need to stop skipping that once a week, it just makes getting started again more difficult. people keep telling me it's OK to skip a day and have a rest. i just don't think that's a good idea right now. i think i can allow myself a day if i'm ill or super uncomfortable. but if there is no reason for me to not walk, i should be walking.

i am started on week 3. week 3. wow. i'm starting to allow myself to feel a little pride on this.